A Real Eye Opener: The Truth about The Underground

A Real Eye Opener: The Truth about The Underground

Friday, March 12, 2021
8:39 AM

I know now that I’m ready to write these words down. The words I find come flooding in my head with all the realizations yet again hitting me dropping me to my knees. Seems like that’s all I do these days is dropped my knees and either dry heave or vomit from the the real realizations of everything that’s going on. so before I lose these thoughts in my head because I know how I deal with memory loss they got to be put down to be shared one day for some unknown, another unsuspecting soul to heed this warnning as I tell my story just because I need to put it on paper because that’s all I have left of my life, is the words I put down on paper…so to speak.b


And each time I try to write all this or actually dictate it really cuz I can’t type anymore it gets too much for me to handle I have to stop gather myself that I try to busy my mind where I don’t think about it so I never finish it any of this it’s too much for me to bear. Which is the reason why I don’t go back and read anything to edit anything to proofread it. So then I get laughed at and joked about about the way I can’t write well I used to write now I just dictate my thoughts just for me really keep a journal for myself maybe one day my writings will be shared so they can help others that find themselves in this situation. Because I know there’s many others I know there is I know it for a fact I know there is.

As I’m sitting here putting my thoughts together I feel like I’ve been through another deja vu all of a sudden. As I was thinking about where I was last year what I was going through at what point in the stage of this so called evil most horrific game these people play. You truly find yourselves in the palm of the devil’s hoof. NOT HAND! Then my thoughts led me to other people that are going through this kind of stalking. That don’t work in the sex world. So I started crying I said well I’ll go take a shower and that’s when it all flooded me.

When you sit back and think about it it’s very well orchestrated, olanned, it’s perfect. I’ve written before about the perfect murder, very much here so… honestly. You don’t even realize it’s going what’s going on and what the intentions of the actions are really going on. 2 years ago it hit me that every time I tried to run from what I was trying to run from I found myself running right back into it. that’s a scary situation. More than you ever want to know I promise. But it just hit me I was prepped from the very get-go. Of course that’s when my knees buckled again and when I hit the bottom of the tub with a big loud thud, it rocked the the tub I hit so hard.


I mean this leads me to wonder, was I targeted a victim or individual or whatever you want to call it in Pennsylvania. I mean this shit makes you wonder about your whole fucking life a question makes you question everything. But here’s what I’m looking at. So I break my arm right. My right wrist, that night I went to the hospital I came back to my apartment to find my apartment robbed two different times. I walked in my back door, and I went to leave to let the neighbor know that I came back and as I was about to grab my back door knob it was being open for me to rob me a third time. The girl I came down here with from Pennsylvania she was an ex bandidio ole lady, who had two girlfriends in particular that were directly cartel… Or supposedly. She that came up North with me but the situation, I had lost my son so I was in the right frame of mind and had asked her to leave right after she got up there I really didn’t know what I was doing at that point in time I was so out of it about my son. So she wanted to come back home she’s from San Antonio so after my disability went through and everything, we made the trip down here four years ago. And very literally from the very second that I put my foot onto the Texas soil it’s been nothing but hell in the very literal seanse of the word.

2 weeks weeks later I find everything I came here with, just out of blue gone. My top dentures gone. The same girl I came down here with extorted me.. well she got $700 out of me but she was extorting me for $900. For some gun that she swore her dad bought her. . but her dad can’t buy guns. From that point on it’s been nothing but a roller coaster it’s not even about 50 roller coasters going all at one time probably since it’s probably more than that actually.

So that leads me to this question. Was I forced? Well it wouldn’t look to be so. Now would it? Enough for the most part when you hear about this on the news. In your mind’s eye you think about crossing the border or being stuck in trucks or like the other day somebody was called through a water tanker truck or something saying they were had no air. When you hear about it these are the kind of thoughts that are very misleading. Because the truth of the matter is, that’s not how it always always happens. The typical everyday situation would be more like mine. Making your situation into forcing you into the underground.

By willfully complying by force.

Yep you heard me right! I had nothing. what was I going to do? There was nothing else I could do but start doing what I started doing. As I said it’s a very well orchestrated plan it’s very very articulated very precise and you never fucking know it.

The fear that comes is it being illegal. Everybody says to legalize like marijuana and NO! NO!: not the case at all!
That would do nothing but bring more fear. Knowing the difference between decriminalization and criminalization is the fact that on this side of the game, even with the laws that have been in place with the Fosta bill. I mean like really how many girls are going to come up and say hey I need help not one of us. and if there happens to be one or a couple or a handful, that would be a miracle or not or that and they would be quite ballsy and I have to say I’m a pretty ballsy person to say the least.

The the desperate need for decriminalization is imperative that we can get this situation decriminalized it’s so freaking imperative. The amount of lives that are lost and one way or the other and I can promise you even being alive still my whole life is gone just gone by other people’s hands. And I know since I’ve been able to identify a lot of them I know these are repeat offenders constantly hurting other people and yet I can’t do nothing about it or can I.?

But just like the rest of us girls out here too scared.

Going back to my thoughts about your mind’s eye when you hear about this kind of thing on the news. You know I’ve been hollering it for at least 2 years now out in the public. Free slave labor not even not even I mean I was just to be like that I was people’s joke my life my whole life they made out and exploited and fucked up and laughed at me laughed at the pain in my face last Easter laughed from being cooked inside out. I WAS LAUGHED AT, I WAS MOCKED, HUMILIATING OUT IN PUBLIC, DESTRUCTIVE EVERYTHING AND WHILE I WAS BEING COOKED ON EASTER LAST YEAR WHEN THERE WAS NOBODY IN THE STREET BECAUSE OF THE QUARANTINE MY WHOLE FACE WAS ON FREAKING FIRE AGAIN FELT LIKE I WAS ON I WAS BURNING IN HELL……YET AGAIN I WAS JUST LAUGHED AT.

Someone I’m reality I was just made to be the butt end of everybody’s joke. Nothing more. And definitely a whole lot less. You know when you come to these kinds of realizations talk about making you feel worthless more than worthless it’s lower than lower than low than low than low and I can’t even begin to describe it.

when my knees buckled in the tub, in my head all I did was scream up for my mom. I wanted her to hold me. I wanted to feel safe again for once. When the realization hits you that you’ve really been trafficking in the real sense but maybe to look like it was all of you I can’t begin to explain this it’s a nightmare that you don’t ever wake up from because you never go to sleep.

You it was so bad to reach out for help but even as I’m dictating this my tablet has been fucking with me you’re always watched I found two more secret recordings on my tablet this morning.

I’m sure I’m going to regret saying this, but haha they may be still getting my sound but I’ll be damned they didn’t get my fucking cameras I got tape on all my cameras now. And I mean like I’m stuck because I dictate because I can’t type anymore my hands shake too much from the trauma I’ve endured. Yet again I’m not too swallow the fact that I REALLY been trafficked. Meaning prophecy has really come true. I wonder it makes any girl Wonder or any guy or anybody that’s putting this situation. Is this really hell? But I know there’s worse just always worse.

What did I mean about my face being cooked you ask? By EMFs. I can tell you by going through it myself I really thought I was in hell.

I WAS PUT ON PUBLIC DISPLAY, AS SOMEBODY WAS COOKING ME FROM INSIDE OUT MICROWAVING ME.

WHAT A FUCKING NIGHTMARE TO GO THROUGH. I WAS PUBLICLY DISPLAYED AND LAUGHED AT, MADE FUN OF TOLD I WAS CRAZY WELL THEY WERE COOKING ME AT THE SAME TIME FROM INSIDE OUT.

HOW DOES SOMEONE DEAL WITH THIS REALIZATION? WITH THIS HORRIFYING TRUTH OF WHAT IS REALLY GOING ON?

I nobody heard me from the very beginning I’m discredited so bad and I mean it’s so far fetched out there that it’s not believable.

ITS A REAL FUCKED UP EYE OPENER I DAMN WELL ASURE YOU!

I’M DEFINITELY NOT MAKING NONE OF THIS STUFF I HAVE WAY MORE THAN 60 GB APPROVED TO PROVE IT THAT EVEN STILL


THE FEAR.

So yet it seems like there’s no way out but a slow cooked death that’s most horrifying beyond anybody’s comprehension. Just an experiment…that’s all nothing more. A guinea pig.

So these are my thoughts that I have had to come to terms with or trying or I don’t know the realizations are hitting me so I’m jotting it all down journaling. Maybe one day somebody will see this that I won’t have to pay for.

This is why I don’t sell my content no more. I’ve already got enough to deal with they used it as a way to get me out of the house to buy cigarettes or food so they can break into the house some more fuck with my stuff. They used it as a controlling weapon. I paid with my life my skin everything I’m just de-skinned really in the real sense. I won’t sell it because of all this. Hell I can’t even get through editing this stuff because it’s too painful to get through. So anyways time to suck it up buttercup get back home with my day whatever that is.

Happy st patrick’s day btw

Wednesday March 17th 2021 11:47 a.m.